Judgement day.

Err...week...

One of my biggest pet peeves is premature judgement.  Not that I haven't been found guilty because I would readily admit that one of my biggest weaknesses is judging others.  Not you, of course.  Just others.

=P

Needless to say, I have felt the sting of being judged more times than seems normal this past week and I don't know if it really is me or if it's something in the water.

Example #1:
On Thursday I needed a newspaper.  Conveniently there is a newspaper stand right in front of our local post office, which is less than a mile away.  So I went and pulled up in front of the newspaper dispenser, stuck on my hazards, and grabbed my change.  As I did that, a car pulled in behind me, apparently thinking I was moving forward...?  Not sure her thoughts, but she wasn't too pleased that I was stopped and getting out of my car in front of the newspaper dispenser so she sped her car around mine and yelled at me:  "THAT'S NOT A PARKING SPOT!!!"  I looked around to be sure it was me she was yelling at.  Apparently it was.  So she whipped her car in front of mine, stopped it and got out to drop mail in the mailbox.  Well, you know me, I'm just so sweet so I let her know, "that's not a parking spot."

"I'M JUST MAILING SOME PACKAGES"  


"Well, I'm just buying a newspaper."   So there.  And ironically we took the same amount of time, including me getting more change from my car because - FYI folks - newspapers cost a $1.  Of course, as fate would have it, I had to follow her the mile back to my house because she happened to be going the exact same direction as myself.  Awkward.

Example #2:
I had to go to the store today.  Fine. Great  Wonderful.  Fantastic.  I also had to take all three of my kids with me.  Fine. Great  Wonderful.  Fantastic.  And it's a Saturday in December.  Yeah...not so fine, great, wonderful OR fantastic.  Parking is ridiculous, friends, ridiculous.  So I grabbed a spot over yonder and trekked it towards the store.  With all three kids.  On a Saturday in December.  Oy.  Shopping was actually fine, except for one child spilling a water bottle all over the floor and another peeing their pants a stone's throw away from the bathroom, for which I had to tear off a jacket from another child to clean it up.  Fine, great, wonderful...really guys, just fantastic.  Not anything a super mom can't handle.  Although I do give myself props for thinking of the jacket-turned-towel.  Brilliant.

But then came the time to load the car with the groceries.  Fine.  And get the children in their seats and settled.  Great.  I was then stuck with a cart, and don't you forget that we parked "over yonder" so my options on what to do with the cart were limited.  Wonnnnderful.  I could park it behind the car next to me or jump it onto a nearby curb.  I sweetly (because that's how I do things) put it up on the curb and out of the way of traffic.  Fantastic.

Wouldn't you know that at that exact time the Honorable Judge was destined to walk past.  With a disgusted look on his face he blurted out  "Reeeally??"  Again, I did the look around to be sure it was me he was accusing.  Yep, definitely me.  This time I was exhausted and just let it go.  Of course he couldn't have seen me load three kids into my car.  And he definitely wasn't a mom, so he couldn't understand my fear of walking away from my car with such precious cargo inside, especially on a Saturday in December.  But to make his point even more brutally clear, he grabbed my cart and stared me down as he took it to its rightful place.  Umm, thank you?

I just sunk into my car seat and drove home feeling defeated and tried to encourage myself that I had done nothing wrong.  It's been a rough week.

What's the point of this particular blog?  I guess it's this:
-If you're being prematurely judged, consider the reality that they don't know your whole story and, in their minds, they think they're right.
-If you're prematurely judging, consider the reality that you don't know the whole story and you may very well be wrong.
-Don't give your child a water bottle in the grocery store.
-Visit the bathroom frequently.

For the love of cake...

When I found out I was pregnant with my son, I was a wee bit bummed that his due date was in the middle of November.  You see, my birthday is in November.  And so is my twin sister's.  And my husband's, my uncle's, and my grandpa's.  So I was disappointed that his birthday would have to be shared with so much family.  Surprisingly, my son came 3 weeks early - in late October - and we avoided the whole November birthday conflict.

However, four months later I found out I was pregnant again.  And due in November.  My daughter came 5 days after my husband's birthday, and 5 days before mine.  Oh well, we could still have fun with that.  Then the next year I gave birth to my third child.  In November.  Ironically, I now wish my son's birthday was November just for the sake of unity.

Needless to say, November is a busy month for us given that our birthday's tend to hug Thanksgiving like a long-lost relative and we spend a solid two weeks eating and celebrating...and baking.  

So last week, in a matter of four days, I made four cakes (and some cake pops) and had a blast doing it!  Here are some pics:

French Vanilla (box mix) with Swiss Meringue Buttercream

"Autumn Delight" cake (sweet potato cake) with Brown Sugar Swiss Meringue

Raspberry Chocolate Ganache

(I noticed the cute little finger swipe after I took the pic)

 My fourth cake was a carrot cake order that I didn't get a pic of before it was picked up.  

However, here is a pic of me holding my birthday cake, made by my amazing Dad.  

Who knew he could make cakes?!?  I was hugely impressed.

Now it is time to recoup before Christmas.  =)

I'm Thankful.

1. I'm thankful for my family.  We have had some great highs and some extreme lows.  But God is sovereign and loves to bless.  What a gift.

2. I'm thankful for the unbelievable freedom of going into this season 100% debt free.  It hasn't been easy, we've had to make sacrifices, but it's been worth it.  What a gift.

3. I'm thankful for my husband's job.  There are so many people facing the reality of unemployment, and yet my husband was blessed with a career where, not only does his company continue to grow, but he is able to provide jobs for others.  What a gift.

4. I'm thankful for my friends.  Never before have I realized the treasure chest of friends I have been blessed with.  Through even our low times and our efforts to pursue adoption, we have not just been surrounded, but we have been picked up and carried by these people.  What a gift.

5. I am thankful for the fulfillment of wants.  Not only have needs been met in abundance, but I have been blessed with so many of my wants as well.  A cutting board set, hot coffee on cold mornings, a new outfit, great books to read, and several date nights with my husband are just a few of them.  What a gift.  

6. A God who continues to love, forgive, and bless me.  Just the other night I read about how awesome it is to give praise to a God whom we cannot exaggerate.  What a gift.

I know people say we should be thankful for these things everyday.  I am.  Nonetheless I still appreciate being given a day to meditate on all the blessings in my life, and to spend that day with friends and family doing the same.  

What a gift.

The Day I Was An Awful Mommy

A few days ago my children went insane.

A typical day with them includes a handful of interventions, but three days ago that "handful" amounted to at least twenty before lunchtime.  I was losing both discipline options and my patience very quickly.  So when I heard a curdling scream from my bedroom, I ran back there and grabbed the offending party (my middle daughter), gave her a swat on the bottom, and plopped her on my bed.  "You stay here and DO NOT MOVE."

I grabbed the younger, injured party and started for the girls room, with the intention of separating them for the next hour.  However, on my way out the door I heard the sobbing scream from my bed, "Bu-ut Mommy!!  I di-didn't d-d-d-do it!!!!"


I looked at my youngest whom was still crying due to her injury, then looked at the accused questioningly.  I knelt down and asked my daughter how she got hurt.  "Fr-from the cl-cl-closet."  *sniff*sniff*

My stomach dropped.  I had done what no parent ever wants to do - I'd punished in frustration.  But worse than that, I had punished unfairly.  I had sent a message to my children that the judge and jury they depend on for daily mediation can be unfair and unjust.  Talk about brutal humbling.

So I did the only thing I could think of.  I cried.  I cried and I asked her to forgive me because I, her mommy, had completely wronged her.  Her own teary eyes stared at me for a split second until she realized that she was no longer in trouble, then broke into a huge grin and let out the sound of perfection: a giggle.  I had been forgiven.

Why did I write this?  Because I want to make it clear that I am not a perfect parent.  My dear child was the victim of a a faulty justice system, and it was my fault. But I've learned that honesty in this area usually begets improvement, and improvement in this area is what I crave.

So thanks for reading my confession.  Tomorrow I expect to be perfect.

Birthday Party Success!

Today is my son's 6th birthday.  They're not lying when they say they grow up too fast.  This morning I watched him making pancakes for breakfast.  He asked me to come over and pour some into shapes so I tried, but they kept coming out funny.  "That one looks like a pickle."  "That one looks like the moon."  At least he was positive about it.  Apparently I even made one that looked like a chrysalis.  Props to me for that.

Since his birthday fell on a Monday, we decided to have his birthday party on Saturday.  And MAN did we have fun!!  We asked the boys to come at 9am, still dressed in their p.j.'s.  We fed them cereal, watched Saturday morning cartoons and had a rockin' pillow fight.

Here are some pics of the event!

The invitation.  Funny story about Noah.  My son said he wanted to invite this little boy to the party, but I found out later that he was no longer in C's AWANA group...and hadn't been since LAST YEAR.  With no way to contact him, we had to forfeit the attempt.

We had gobs of cereal waiting for them!

Coloring pages of Phineas and Ferb - C's cartoon of choice.

Can't forget the vitamins!

The favors, their own cereal spoon and some magic milk straws.
(They also took home a box of their own cereal concoction.)

Pillows are fluffed and ready for the pillow fight.

My blue couch joined in the festivities.  Can you see why I love it so much?  : )

The pillow fight!

The Birthday (pan)Cake!  Layered with chocolate chips, this was a huge hit!

Overall, this party was absolutely perfect.  I would totally recommend it to anyone looking for an easy (and affordable) birthday option!  

(For more ideas on the event, take a look at the blog where I stole this idea from here.)

My thoughts on occupying ANY street.

First of all, Occupy Wall Street confuses me.  Can some tell me EXACTLY what the goal of the movement is?

I read on the Occupy Wall Street website that this movement is"fighting back against the corrosive power of major banks and multinational corporations over the democratic process, and the role of Wall Street in creating an economic collapse that has caused the greatest recession in generations."


Huh?  


How much power can major banks, multinational corps and the so-called "Wall Street" possess if not first granted by our friend, Mr. Government?  None.  


Let's consider, for instance, the housing market crash.  Thanks to my real estate classes, I've learned quite a bit on the subject:


In 1977, Congress passed the Community Reinvestment Act which required lending companies to quit discriminating against credit requests from people in low-income neighborhoods.  Up until the year 2000, the percentage of lending devoted to low-income living was at or around 30%.  


In 2000, during the Clinton Administration, that percentage was raised to a whopping 55%, and in 2007 (during Bush's administration), was raised again to 55%.  


So herein lies Problem #1:  Subprime mortgages.  More than half of all mortgages being given out by financial institutions were what we call "subprime", which literally means "less than prime." 


Problem #2:  Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac were busy buying up these loans.  Banks lend buyers the money, then turn around and sell those loans (more specifically the interest) to larger companies (e.g. Freddie Mae, et al) so that they have the cash to keep giving mortgages to borrowers.  That's fine and dandy, and it worked great, unless it's the government insuring most of these mortgages, and most of these mortgages are subprime.


Problem #3: Investors stopped investing.  How is it that Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac could keep buying up these mortgages from the banks?  It's because investors would invest their money for what are known as Mortgage -Backed Securities (MBS).  I'm not going to go into the details of those.  When the interest rates jumped up on the subprime mortgages, the borrowers could no longer afford them so they stopped paying them, which obviously made investors worry about their investments and stop investing.  With no more money coming into Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac and no money being paid on the mortgages, it only makes sense that the entire system crashed.  


But wait.  Who started the problem?  (Answer:  the government)


In a study regarding lottery winners, published in The Review of Economics and Statistics, results showed that more money does not solve a spending crisis.  Essentially people who cannot handle a budget rarely do any better when more money is handed over to them.  So while I am in 100% agreement with the OWS movement in that large corporations (big banks, etc) should not be bailed out of financial hardships as a result of stupidity, I also don't believe they should be paying more in taxes than is already required.  Teach the government to work on a budget, and then reevaluate the tax percentages.  


I suppose watching my husband run a business gives me a bias in this situation.  He is incredibly fiscally responsible when it comes to running his business and our family willingly takes a smaller income just so he can pay off his business debts faster (e.g. truck leases). 
My husband and I pay for our own health insurance, we are funding our own retirement (and don't anticipate taking in Social Security, although we pay it dutifully), my husband lowers the unemployment rate via his business, and we give to charities monthly.  We are definitely part of the 99% who work hard.  However, I refuse to see the economical problems we're facing originating from the (much too stereotyped) 1%.  I'd argue that it's a two-fold problem resulting from a) the lack of morals we are seeing throughout our country's leadership, both government and corporate and b) yes, I'll say it - our government is too big.

Curious...

I have two siblings and five cousins in my generation of the family tree.  The kicker here is that, of the 8 of us, we are ALL FEMALE.  So I missed out on some seemingly necessary information regarding the opposite sex.  Some of it was easy to understand and accept:  they like dirt, and trucks, and blowing things up.  And if they can't participate in it themselves, they like to watch shows about it.  But after being married to a man for the past 7 years, one thing still puzzles me.

Why do men believe they have the power to change the color of a traffic light?